You’ve Offended Me – 10 Opinions Sure To Piss Someone Off

The day was cool and crisp, my long dirty blond hair was loose down my back.  My bare feet were filthy dirty and my dress was torn in a few places.  Anyone who would come across me in those woods would have assumed I was a feral child; not the daughter of a mother who desperately attempted to tame her gypsy girl.  I had spent so many hours of my childhood in these woods; climbing trees, building forts, and eating wild apples and berries.  I could sing out loud in these woods, no parents telling me to hush after my third hour of the same song.  I could say what I want, scream if I want, and I had no worries about who I would offend.  I didn’t have to be prim and proper here.  No, here I could scrape my knees, have knots in my hair, and dirty feet and no one would call me unladylike.  Who wanted to be a prim and proper lady anyways?  It sounded dreadfully boring and I simply didn’t have time for it.  There was too much to do.

On this day, I had my dog Cracker with me, his brown fur filled with the mud we had both taken time to play in, and he joyfully bounded behind me as I ran towards “my spot”.  My spot was a tiny opening in the trees, where a little pond sat lit by a long slender patch of sunlight.  Tiny yellow flowers would cut through the green of the grass and tickle my feet as I walked towards the water to cool myself in.  I had visited this spot so many times that to this day I can tell you exactly how it smells in the summer, the feel of the cool grass on my skin, and the sound of the water moving in the breeze.  On this day I burst out of the shadows of the trees and into the sunlight and found the little boy that lived down the street from us with his feet in my pond.  I cannot even begin to explain to you how absolutely furious this made me.  I was offended, I was angry, this boy had destroyed my magical little spot.  It was mine and he had besmirched it with his disgusting boy feet in my beautifully cool pond.  How dare he.  My fists tightened, my face felt hot with the flush of rage, and I marched across that grass with the sass of a little girl unhinged….and he laughed.  The sound ripped through my ears and in an instant, I made a decision that I would later regret.  I punched him square in the nose.  There was a crack, a scream, and blood.  So much blood.

I broke his nose.  There was no way around it and I couldn’t hide the fact, his blood was covering my dress.  I tried to apologize, I tried to make it right, but the truth was my anger had gotten the better of me and I was going to be in trouble.  I knew it instantly.  My father would not let this go without some sort of scene.  I walked this pond-besmirching filthy boy to his house and when his mother asked me what happened all I could quietly mutter was “I punched him in the nose for having his feet in my pond.”  You could see my house from his kitchen window, it was the longest walk I’ve ever made in my life.  I had to tell my mom who would tell my dad who would make up some punishment that would either require serious physical work or would teach me a lesson I didn’t want to learn.  I didn’t want to know I was wrong.  He had his feet in my pond and laughed at me.  He had it coming but I knew that no adult would ever see the logic in this.  I slowly walked up the back steps to our house, turned the door handle, and stood in the kitchen.  “Child, get your nasty self off of my floors…”  My mother’s eyes had seen the blood and she stopped.  I saw fear cross her face and then she saw that I wasn’t hurt at all.  “What did you do now?”  I told her about our neighbor boy, my pond, and I cried.  I had mustered up my best possible act of remorse.  Maybe if she saw how sorry I was pretending to be she wouldn’t punish me or worse, call my dad.

By the time the next month was completed, I had not only done all of my own chores but all of the pond stealing boy’s chores too.  It did not endear him to me at all.  That laughing sneering face.  I threatened to break his nose again so many times in that month that four times I had to write him half-hearted apology letters; I hope he got the sarcasm I put in those.  I did, however, learn some valuable lessons: 1. That was NOT my pond at all and that I had to share it since the property line literally cut it in half.  2. That being offended and angry never gave me an excuse to resort to violence.  3. My perception and the truth was that the pond was mine but he had equal claim to it.  Truth is relative to what your experiences are and does not equate to absolute truth at all.

Today, we often see people who seem to think that being offended gives them some leeway on the basics of human decency.  I think everyone should have broken a neighbor’s nose as a child because somewhere in their life they missed this basic lesson.  Today, I am going to lay out ten opinions I have that seem to have recently offended people online.  So here’s a warning, I am probably going to trigger you.   I will lay out my position, probably offend someone, and then will have to explain further and that’s just fine.  Let me just lay these out and see where this goes.

1. Women and men are not created equal.  First, we’re not created at all but we are the results of thousands of years of evolution.  An evolutionary process that has shaped our bodies and minds to complete tasks and each gender supports tasks that the other gender struggles with.  For instance, as a woman, I am better at multitasking and hearing higher pitched noises.  Men, however, are better at physical strength tasks and are often better at tasks requiring tactical foresight.
2. Not all Trump voters are idiots.  I actually understand why Trump won and why so many did vote for him.  Clinton represented a very old and very powerful political elite that many people in this country were sick of seeing.  She represented an old school powerful few and many were looking to shake up Washington.  Now, I don’t necessarily think this worked for them but I can see why so many wanted someone completely different in office.
3. Pride should be reserved for things you actually accomplished.  The fact is that I did not choose my vagina and therefore I am not proud of being a woman.  No one was given a swatch of colors to choose their race.  No one chose what religion, nation of birth, or economic status their family had.  None of these things are worthy of pride since you didn’t work to accomplish it.
4. Gun control is a much larger issue than taking away guns.  In my opinion, we should have guns in the hands of private citizens but I see no reason for anyone to have an arsenal.  We also need to have free access to mental health care, we need to change a violent entertainment culture, and we need to outlaw lobbyists in Washington.  There’s a much larger picture here and I don’t think either extreme of this issue has any clue what it would really take to fix it.
5. Talking about offending veterans for not standing for the flag is complete and utter bullshit.  What’s really offensive to veterans is allowing them to sleep on the streets when they get home, making them wait weeks for a doctor’s visit, and even telling them that they should be offended by this action.  The only time anyone seems to care about our men and women in the military is when they can still be useful.  We can shoot a missile with absolute precision across the ocean but we can’t seem to figure out how to have the money to support those veterans when they get home.
6. Free speech includes even the things you don’t like and it never gives you the right to punch someone just because you do disagree.  Yes, white supremacists are disgusting but they have the right to speak and you have the right to give your points.  You do not have the right to physically attack them simply for having an opinion that is different from yours.  It also means that you should not have the right to stop speakers at a university because you don’t agree with what this person says.  Universities should be places where we are tested and presented with opposing views we can work through.  Do not live in an echo chamber.
7. The new progressive left feminism does far more damage to the feminist movement than any man could ever do.  The second you emasculate an entire gender simply for what their genitals are you’ve already lost the argument.   It is not true equality if you have to beat down another gender to get there.
8. You being offended means absolutely nothing.  I don’t care if you’re offended and no one should have to walk on eggshells as they try to navigate this current “offended” society.  Knowing that you will always piss someone off just for having an opinion helps you to become more comfortable with giving that opinion.  So they’re offended, why should you care?
9. Not all religion is bad.  I think there are people who really do great things for their societies based on religion.  Religion also has an ability to help people who are struggling to get their footing in the world.  It’s not that I agree with what they are teaching but I do not believe all religion is horrible all of the time.
10. Islam is absolutely the most dangerous religion on the planet today.  This doesn’t make me an Islamaphobe.  It is simply a fact of numbers.  They are doing far more damage right now than their contemporary counterparts are.

I promise I will not break any noses for disagreeing with me and I’m fairly sure I will get some pushback from this.  It’s to be expected.  We are at a crossroads in this country today where everyone seems to have this broad belief that everyone else is wrong.  No one actually accepts the fact that they could be misinformed.  We live in these bubbles and place ourselves in boxes.  If in describing yourself it takes you ten minutes of titles it is safe to say you are part of this group.  Humans are more complicated than just your political views and most of us don’t live in extremes.  Have a discussion today with someone you don’t agree with, who knows what could happen.

Love,

The atheist, feminist, sort of leftist, nearly always sassy, mischievous, nightmare!